dream: 41
in the dream there is a boulder
of the shape and size
that might block the entrance
to a cave
for some reason
he ascribes the number 41
to the rock
to one side of the boulder is a void
to which, for equally obscure reasons
he ascribes the number “10”
10, the age of his elder son
41+10=51; his current age
he replays the events
of the past 10 years
in his mind
recalling his absences
from his son’s life
and the impact
these must have made
on the boy’s development
gradually, he drifts into uneasy sleep