Kaptain's Blog

The writings and musings of The Kaptain

Sunday, September 18, 2011

goodbye great man

he saw what was coming
and smiled wanly

magnificent, brave man

then upchucked a puddle
of what first responders
would later, in code,
call “coffee”
(and, forgetting themselves momentarily,
“A massive internal bleed, probably”).

he asked his son to sit him upright
but his discomfort would not lessen
his wife, below,
squawked into the hallway phone
distracting herself, denying

a rare curse left his lips, reluctantly:
“bastard,” he said

then keeled over
to the right,
robbed of his dignity,
still clutching a bucket
part filled with coffee
and was gone

posted by Kirk at 5:29 am  

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Seeking But Not Finding (For Robbi)

rather than his treading down upon it
the pavement rose up to meet his soles
with every stride

it was taking him
on a journey
he neither chose
nor rejected

his direction was indeterminate and unnoticed
both at once,
was bereft of his will

he sensed he was part of a whole
but a whole of which he was unsure

and he knew they would mock, dare he reveal
this secret

it played on his mind
to the extent he could no longer think
and his body, once strong, became weaker
every day

seeking but not finding,
his mind was the bane of his soul

posted by Kirk at 3:41 am  

Friday, September 16, 2011

Untitled (4)

the system will not log me on
some undisclosed error
my sons fiddle with iphone, their god
books lay scattered, idly, on the floor
their riches unread
the work of someone’s years lost without survey

loud voices from the kitchen:
preparations for a meal
eaten while (american) tv bears witness

the clatter of crockery reverberating
from stainless steel cavities of modernity
hollywood bitches bitching
flat screen

everyday life

i woke up today and
wished i could wake down
thank you
for my being born

posted by Kirk at 3:28 am  

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Garden

the garden
was a neat and tidy place
where he pedalled,
up and down

bees droned away their lives
above its verdant grace;
the smell of grass wafted round

his shirt was a favourite:
chequered, not plain
and while it grew tatty
he gave it a name
he couldn’t pronounce
with the sole tooth sticking out of his mouth

through the wire fence
a strawberry called,
begging to be picked.
it drew his gaze
but his mother’s, in return, was dark

not for her the shame
of an embarrassing trip next door
to explain
how the young man had, so atrociously, erred


when it rained
the garden swarmed,
came to life
brimmed with joy
but that wasn’t for people, just birds

from the stuffy indoors
he would watch
as they shivered off raindrops
and nary a word

before long, a big dog
(who needs walking!)
and schoolbooks to carry
then came the girls
and slowly the garden shrank
to the size of a postage stamp

but still the birds came
and the rain fell even stiller and cold
though he no longer saw these miracles –

he’d let go

of a transient place
of the lushness, of grace
in a heartbeat
to which he’d now return

posted by Kirk at 3:10 am  

Saturday, September 10, 2011

is this it

muscle weight falling
i feel weak
what is this
i used to be strong
is this real or a mind thing
is this it
is this it
is this it

posted by Kirk at 11:27 pm  

Monday, September 5, 2011

Visiting Heaven

In heaven
I found a table set for two
A cheeseboard and grapes occupied the centre
I sat and waited for I did not know whom
Some carefree banter
Or a sticky interview?
The room was spacious, yet not vast
And spare-
Just a square grey table in a white square room
I saw no windows or doors
I waited and waited
And finally withdrew
But the waiting had given me
Time to ponder
That one day
I’d be back in that room

posted by Kirk at 5:45 am  

Thursday, August 4, 2011


a leader
a friend
whose values i admire
a man whose resolve
to which i aspire
still brave
in the face
of the moment he saw coming
i will follow
i will follow
till the end of being

posted by Kirk at 1:56 am  

Monday, July 11, 2011


Say what’s on your mind in real time: you might not get a second chance
Sleep with someone you love to wake next to, whose final parting you would grieve
Tell your friends that you value their friendship
Don’t get angry with fools, they’ll be all around you your whole life
Never fear of asking for help: it is only those fools who will mock
Always be kindhearted: be generous in the face of anger
Don’t overreach: there is no need to impress
Stay true to what you know is right, regardless of the greed you see
Leave notes for those who’ll survive you: their unravelling will help distract them
And when there is nothing left but the rays of the sun, soak them up on your face and smile

posted by Kirk at 2:32 am  

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Marvellous Bird

What is enough?
To muzzle up to the small of your back
To smell the yourness, lick the beads of your sweat
To reach around and stroke the warmth of your breasts
That is enough.
You put the cream
In my cracker,
Marvellous bird

posted by Kirk at 1:51 am  

Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Waste Land (TS Eliot)

good, this. reminds me of some of rio ferdinand’s tweets. (not.)


posted by Kirk at 12:25 pm  
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